Four Skills Everyone Should Have
Over on Substack I wrote about mood and atmosphere. The premise opened up with certain life rules I have. I started to write about the four skills that I think everyone should know. They are essential skills in life and they represent skills that are sadly going the way of the Stick Shift. And yes, I drive one.
Do you want to know what the four essential skills are?
Of course ya do.
Here goes. Everyone should know how to Start a Fire, Change a Flat Tire, Shoot a Handgun and Make the Perfect Martini. If you know how to do these four things you can handle most of the challenges that life will throw at you. These aren’t the only skills someone needs to know but if you know these chances are you will pick up other skills.
Start a Fire. Weather you want to create some ambiance at home on a chilly night or if you are out camping or if you are surviving like Les Stroud fire is important. It looks simple until it isn’t. There is a science to making a fire and ignoring it will result in too much smoke in your house and being cold in nature. If you know how to properly light a fire, you will be warm, can cook food, purify water and be entertained. Any one of which is kind of important.
Change a flat tire. Years ago, when we were just dating my Long Suffering Wife and I were leaving the wedding of two close work friends. Because I was driving a shitbox nine year old Ford Probe, that for the record I loved, we took her newish Ford Focus. It was a good car that came with Blaupunkt Stereo system. When I was a kid Blaupunkt’s were found in cars like Porsche 911’s not modest Euro-Fords.
I digress. Leaving the wedding we heard the unmistakable rumbling of a flat tire. If you know…you know. Standing outside in the warm, humidity of early summer, my future bride said; “We’ll just call the Auto club.”
Years of driving shitbox cars had left me uniquely set up to shine in this moment.
“Future Long Suffering Wife, we’ll do no such thing. I shall change it!” I said in my best command voice. I mean or words to that effect. I am not saying that’s the moment she knew she wanted to someday be my Long Suffering Wife but… It might have helped that I was able to change the tire in all of about ten minutes giving the impression that I was far more competent than I am.
Fire a Handgun. Years ago the Zombie Apocalypse was all the rage in TV and movies. Regular people faced hordes of undead and dispatched the with firearms of all types. These seemingly regular people, without any training or frankly even zeroed sights, dispatched the undead with the skill that would make Delta Force proud.
The thing about learning to shoot a Handgun, the long ones too, is that hopefully there is some training involved. The best training, will always deal with the safety rules and they are cannon. But most importantly, learning to shoot is as much about as learning when and how not to shoot. In country awash with guns and people too, that seems like an awfully important skill.
My late father felt a Gentleman should know how to cook, make a cocktail, be able to carry on an intelligent conversation and whole bunch of other skills if he intended to meet, impress and carry on some sort of relationship. I think LSW still blames him for her continued marital misfortune of having ended up with me.
I can’t condense all of those lessons into a short blog. Hell I might still be learning some of them with half century on this planet. Let focus on the Martini, because it’s simple and elegant. Like most simple, elegant things it’s easy to screw up. Now by Martini I am not talking about some drink that is any of a number of colors that comes in a Martini glass with garnish. Those are cocktails that bars tack Martini onto some other distinctive term so they can charge you $22.50.
Nope, we’re talking about Gin or Vodka and dry Vermouth. You can make them dirty by adding the brine from the olive jar if you need to but for me I like it simple. I also detest Gin unless it’s with it’s soulmate Tonic or in the incomparable French 75. Google it if you don’t know.
Get a martini shaker. put three or four cubes of ice in it. Pour in a teaspoon of dry vermouth, put the lid on and shake or swirl it around. Strain the vermouth out. Add Vodka. I won’t tell you how much because I tend to eyeball everything and ad lib all recipes. Drives LSW crazy. Put the lid on and shake vigorously for thirty to forty-five seconds. I don’t time it. I wait until there is frost on the outside of the shaker. Pour it into a martini glass and consume. Be mindful, when talking to your future or current LSW, the tendency to tip the martini glass forward, spilling martini on her toes, dramatically increases with each martini. Trust me. I know.
Chances are if you’ve needed any of the first three skills, then you’ll really need the fourth.